Jon Stewart tackled the latest Republican debate on the Daily Show last night, and the Republicans’ seemingly insatiable desire for more candidates. He summarily dismissed Rick Santorum’s opposition to gays in the military (“What planet do you f***ing live on?”) and joined the dog pile mocking Rick Perry. After a clip of Perry mangling his words, Stewart adopted a Texan accent and said, “I can’t believe my advisers told me not to get high before this debate. I’m killing it!”
Of course, Perry’s poor performance has intensified calls for Chris Christie to jump in. “You want to add another candidate?!” Stewart asked. “It’s like the Republican primary is a season of American Idol in reverse, where every week you just add some other idiot!” The GOP base, he theorizes, will never be satisfied with anyone. “It’s like your ideal candidate is a rare super-heavy element that could only exist in a particular particle accelerator. And even then only for a fraction of a second—before you all remembered how much you hate science.” (More Jon Stewart stories.)