Like last year, Punxsutawney Phil rose early this morning, looked around, and doomed us all to six more weeks of winter, reports the AP. The official proclamation: "Forecasts abound on the Internet, but I, Punxsutawney Phil, am still your best bet. Yes, a shadow I see, you can start to Twitter, hash tag: Six more weeks of winter!" The rodent is a pretty shadowy guy: It's the 102nd time he's seen his shadow in the history of the stunt, while he's given us an early spring just 17 times.
Meanwhile, the Staten Island Advance reports that Phil's considerably more slippery neighbor to the north, Staten Island Chuck, has predicted an early spring—just in time for the blizzard currently bearing down on the Northeast. (More groundhog day stories.)