People Picks Its Sexiest Man Alive, to 'Chagrin' of 'Entire Internet'

Blue-eyed country music star Blake Shelton has joined the ranks of Johnny Depp, George Clooney, David Beckham, and Hugh Jackman as People's Sexiest Man Alive. "I can't wait to shove this up Adam's ass," Shelton, 41, says of his fellow The Voice judge Adam Levine, who was named Sexiest Man Alive in 2013. But "y'all must be running out of people," the 6'5" singer with salt-and-pepper hair tells People. "Like, wow, we're down to somebody who is somewhat symmetrical." That's also the prevailing response from shocked columnists and social media users. Some of the best reactions:

• Seriously? "Are you sure you've got the right chap? Wears a lot of denim? Looks a bit like Ryan Phillippe under heavy prosthetics playing the lead in a Guy Garvey biopic?" quips the Guardian. The paper concedes Shelton is probably "the sexiest man alive who hasn't been accused of sexual abuse."
• Paging Robert Mueller: "We need a special counsel to investigate this because I am sure that this is just Putin trying to make us crazy," writes R. Eric Thomas at Elle. "I know all men are trash but I wasn't aware that they were all dead, also."
• Expect the unexpected: W Magazine would've preferred Mahershala Ali, Oscar Isaac, James Franco, or Kit Harington. But though the mag notes Shelton's appointment came "much to the surprise—and chagrin—of basically the entire internet," it adds, "that's 2017 for you."

• Racism isn't sexy: In one popular tweet, writer Anthony Oliveira notes Shelton isn't the sexiest country singer, person named Blake, or even the sexiest "Gwen Stefani spouse." Detracting from any sex appeal is the fact that Shelton is a "racist," Oliveira says.
• Not cool, Blake: Marlow Stern at the Daily Beast explains further, citing Shelton's "disturbing history of homophobic and racist tweets." He's threatened to beat up any man that "tries touching my behind" and once said a man should "shut up or learn some English so I would at least know what he's planning to bomb!!" Shelton later apologized.
• The obvious choice: At least Gwen Stefani, Shelton's girlfriend of two years, thinks People is on point. "Well, wow, they got that right! I knew I was on to something," she tells Access Hollywood. "I already had scored, but now I've really scored."

(More Sexiest Man Alive stories.)